3 Quick Tips to Personal Goal Setting Success
What I find so ironic about achieving our goals is that goals are defined as a desired result, so if it’s something that we want, how come upwards of 80% of people fail to achieve their new year’s resolutions?
Why the high failure rate? Lots of reasons are at play including lack of clarity, lack of support, subconscious limiting beliefs, setting goals too big or unrealistic, all or nothing/success or failure thinking, or simply “LIFE” getting in the way.
If you’re tired of falling into the 80% failure rate, here’s 3 tips to start rocking your goals today:
1. Start with clearing instead of adding
I’m SUCH an advocate that self-care first starts with clearing what’s not serving you and only once you clear out some of that, do you start looking at what you strategically and intentionally add in (could be things like journaling, exercising, planning healthy dinners-we all know those are great, healthy things) but if you’re already feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, burnout, it just feels like yet another thing to add to your never-ending to-do list and something you’ll likely feel like a failure at).
The analogy I like to use is if you want to create a beautiful garden, you want to first pull out any weeds first, before you add any new seeds or plants.
So I encourage you to keep this idea of self-care as first being clearing (that could mean saying no, setting boundaries, getting help, delegating, etc.) instead of adding more-even healthy stuff; again especially if you find yourself in this burnout space or if you have a client who is.
Check out my short YouTube Video, “2 Mindset Shifts that Totally Changed My Self-Care Routine”
2. Don’t be a zebra (all or nothing/success or failure either/or language)
Zebra thinking is the all or nothing, success or failure, either/or thoughts we so often fall victim to. Instead of this black or white thinking, we want to become a “Get back on track specialist.”
The idea here is you’re on the journey, not an end destination. So, WHEN not IF you get off track, fall off the wagon, have a setback, or just LIFE happens, it’s important to acknowledge your emotions about that, but not to stay stuck there.
You want to forgive yourself if needed, acknowledge your feelings, and think of ONE tiny shift or step you can take to move forward. You become someone who Gets Back on Track or Pivots-that becomes your identity.
3. Be sure to celebrate
We don’t celebrate enough! Immediately after you complete your tiny habit or take a step towards your goal, and you celebrate, that habit or action will get wired into your brain more quickly and on a deeper level. Why? Because your brain likes feeling good, and we associate success with feeling good. We naturally want to do more of what makes ourselves feel good (pleasure) and less of what doesn’t make us feel good (i.e. Pain; things like “shoulding” on ourselves and being critical).
I mean think about it-as far as I know, there are no books out there called how to beat yourself up to reach your goals or how to berate yourself to success (if you know of one, PLEASE let me know-I gotta get my hands on it)!
Just to clarify what I’m talking about when I say celebrate, this does not need to be anything extravagant, time consuming, or cost any money.
Here’s a few example celebrations: doing a happy dance, saying, “Yes!” or “Yay!,” clapping for yourself; picturing your kids or partner cheering you on, picturing fireworks going off.
I talk more about how to use celebration to cement your habits in my $5k Month Mindset Mini-Course.
I’d love to hear from you on this: Tag me on IG: What’s coming up for you so far around personal goal setting? Any tips or strategies you personally use to set and accomplish your personal goals? Do you have any fun ways you celebrate yourself?
